Adventures in Dadsitting
by mirage888
Summary: When Hermione and Ginny go on a girls' night out, Harry and Ron are left to babysit the kids. What happens when small James discovers something that will astonish Harry? Now newly edited for easier reading!


_(A/N: This is my first HP fic! I haven't read many of the HP fics, so I am really really really sorry if someone had any of these ideas before me. I promise I came up with it on my own, although I was a bit inspired by all the stories set in the future :) Disclaimer: J. K. Rowling owns all things Harry Potter, I own nothing. This oneshot is set before the birth of both Lily Potter and Hugo Weasley, and anything said by James that is grammatically incorrect is supposed to be that way. I apologize for any OOC-ness, and hope to get some lovely reviews!)_

"Now, the diapers are under the changing table, and the formula mix is in the pantry. Are you sure you'll be ok? You remember that their bedtime is-"

Ron cut off a nervous Hermione. "8:30. Yes dear, I know. We'll be fine! I am a _father _after all. I know what I'm doing." His wife did not look convinced. Before she could give him another speech about child care, though, someone knocked on the door.

"Oh, that's them," said Hermione, hurrying to open the door. "Ginny! Harry! And James and Albus too! Won't you come in?"

"Oi, Harry, over here," Ron called to his best mate, figuring the women needed to catch up with one another.

"Hi Ron, Hermione talk your ears off yet? Ginny's not as worried, I bet, but she still gave me quite a bit to listen to," said Harry. When he spoke of his own wife, Harry got a look of both admiration and exasperation in his eyes. It was somewhat amusing to Ron to see someone so in love with his little sister.

Ron clapped Harry on the back. "Well, we'd better let them get in their last words before we kick them out. They should know better than to stick around too long; I mean, the kids are already playing together as it is." Harry looked over to the three children. Two-and-a-half-year-old James was trying to get Albus and Rose, both one, to do something more interesting than just sit there with wide eyes.

Noticing Harry watching him, James said, "Daddy! Why Al an Rosie not pwayin'? Dey borin." He made a "hmph" noise and plopped down with his arms crossed.

Harry laughed, and said to Ron, "He's got a bit of an attitude. He's happiest when Al is doing something interesting, 'cept that's not too often yet."

Ron crossed over to James. "I know what you mean, mate. Your cousin Rosie doesn't do much." He ruffled his nephew's hair.

Rose, hearing her name, looked at her father with wide eyes and said, "Dada?"

Ron couldn't help but melt a little at his daughter's cuteness. "Yeah, sweetie, I'm talking about you," he said, touching her little nose. She giggled happily.

Albus watched all of this curiously. Suddenly, without warning, his eyes welled up with tears. "M-m-mumma!" he cried, stretching his small arms toward Ginny where she stood by the entranceway. Ginny sighed, walked over, and scooped him up.

"What is it, Al?" she asked softly.

"M-mumma," he sniffled, burrowing his head into her chest.

"Are you sure it's such a good idea for us to go out, Ginny?" Hermione asked uncomfortably.

"No, no, of course you should go out!" Ron exclaimed. "You two've done nothing but mother these little troublemakers since you had them. You deserve a night out for yourselves."

"I've got him," said Harry, taking Albus from Ginny. Al sniffled a little but didn't cry; Harry was secretly relieved.

"I think we'd better just get going then, before this lot thinks we're staying," said Ginny. "You know what the kids need," she said, turning to Harry. She gave him a quick peck on the lips and started back for the door. "Come along, Hermione, they'll do all right."

"What if all right isn't good enough?" Hemione muttered under her breath. Admitting defeat, she said her goodbyes to her husband and daughter, and followed Ginny out. "Both of you, contact us if anything happens!" Hermione called as she went out.

"Shoo!" said Ron. He shut the door behind her. "Whew," he said, walking away from the door. "I thought they'd never go. But now we can have some _real _fun, eh kids?" Ron winked at the children. Albus's lip was still quivering, Rose looked confused, and James looked-where was James? "Harry..." Ron began. "Where's James? I swear, if he's causing trouble...like a miniature Fred or George, that one is! Get him!"

Harry quickly placed Albus back on the play mat and called, "James! James, where'd you get to? Your mum will be hearing about this, James!" Unfortunately, Albus did not much like being set down. He began whimpering again, and this time little Rose decided to join him.

"Waaaahhhhh!" they cried, while their anxious fathers frantically searched for the missing toddler.

"Uh-Ron- you stay with the babies! I'll get James, I know where he likes to hide!" said Harry, in a bit of a panic.

"But this is _my _house, and you're more used to dealing with two at once! Why do I get the crying ones?" Ron demanded.

"Don't be thick!" said Harry frustratedly.

"Fine, fine, get him and hurry up," said Ron grumpily. Harry rushed off in search of his eldest son.

* * *

An hour later, all seemed to be well again. Harry had found James hiding in one of the lower kitchen cupboards: "Daddy find me!" he had exclaimed upon discovery. Harry and Ron had gotten the babies calmed down as well; they were now looking at the moving pictures in several childrens' books. Rose was particularly fond of one about a princess in a glittering pink dress, and Al didn't mind it either because the princess rode around on a dragon. James was looking at his own copy of _Babbitty Rabbitty and Her Cackling Stump_. Harry and Ron were relaxed on the living room couch in the next room over with a couple of butterbeers.

"I reckon I could get used to this," said Ron lazily. "The kids pretty well take care of themselves, and there's no Hermione breathing down my neck either."

"Yeah, I s'pose so," said Harry. "D'you think you'll be having any more?"

"Any more what, kids?" asked Ron. He continued, "I dunno. It sounds corny, but Rose is the joy of my life right now. So I guess it's a possibility. Not yet though, Hermione needs to calm down first and I need to...well, I need to get better at it." He looked faintly sheepish, as though he thought he wasn't doing a very good job.

"Come off it," said Harry, slapping Ron on the shoulder. "You do more than fine with Rose. I can tell she really is the...joy of your life." Harry sniggered.

"What about you then?" asked Ron, his ears slightly reddish in color. "You and Ginny aren't planning on _reproducing _anymore, are you?" He looked repulsed by the thought, and said "reproducing" as if it was a dirty word.

Harry laughed it off. "I dunno, mate. Maybe, maybe not. We're ahead of you at least, so we'll see. I have a bit more to deal with than you at this point," he joked. "Besides, you yourself said James is like a small Fred or George. What if Al turns out the same? I'm not sure Ginny and I could take on much more than that."

"True, true," said Ron, nodding. "My Rosie is going to be a good girl, I can tell. Maybe I should keep your boys away from her if they're gonna be a bad influence."

"Why, Ron," said Harry in a voice of mock-horror. "I do believe you are sounding like Percy!"

"Shut up!" said Ron.

Harry stopped still for a moment. "Let's both shut up a second," he said. "Listen." Ron waited, but he didn't hear a thing. He told Harry so. "Exactly," said Harry.

"The kids!" Ron said, bolting for the play room. Harry followed right behind him. Whipping their heads from side to side, they looked for the three small children. They weren't there. "Oh, no, Harry" Ron moaned. "Hermione'll have my hide! They're far too young!"

"Don't just stand there, let's split up!" said Harry. They rushed off to opposite ends of the house. Ron seached the bedrooms. Harry checked the kitchen (cupboards and all) and dining room. Both of them stopped what they were doing, though, when they suddenly thought: _the bathroom! _The two men bolted to the bathroom door, where they knew many potions of many uses were kept within. "You first," said Harry hoarsely.

"Erm...all right, then. On the count of three," said Ron. "One...two...three!" Ron blasted the door open with his wand, and gaped at the sight before him. The bathroom cabinet was wide open, with half the bottles missing or tipped over. The missing bottles were scattered about the bathroom; all over the floor, in the shower, spilled around the sink. And...in three small pairs of hands.

"JAMES," said Harry, horrified. For James seemed to be the ringleader, or course, and he was in the middle of passing two new bottles to the babies seated in the middle of the mess. Albus had steam pouring out of his ears, Rose was turning a nice shade of orange, and James himself was covered head to foot in silky hair.

"Pepperup potion... vitamin C potion...and Wizard Wendell's Instant Hair Growth For Men?" Ron decided, pointing to each child in turn.

"What're you doing with Wizard Wendell's?" asked Harry, choking back a laugh.

Ron turned beet red. "It's not mine...you never know if you'll...we need to get these kids cleaned up and back to normal!" He quickly began repairing broken bottles and siphoning potion into the sink with his wand.

"So what do we do with the kids, then?" asked Harry. "I reckon Al and Rose'll be ok," he continued, "as all they took were immunity boosters. James, though, he'll need something for sure. I'll not have a beast-child for a son."

Ron sniggered and said, "He's halfway there with his behaviour, why not just set him loose as he is now?"

"Ha, ha," said Harry coldly.

Ron's smirk dropped and he set about cleaning up his daughter. "I wonder why the child-proof stoppers didn't work?" he said, annoyed.

"Ah, we've had those before," said Harry. "Doesn't do a bit of good. James figured out that if he bites them enough times, they surrender and let him have it. See, these stoppers have bite marks. He must've done the same thing to yours."

"Bloody magical items," growled Ron. "Completely undependable."

After they'd gotten the bathroom set right and James to be less hairy, Ron and Harry decided not to let the children out of their sight until the wives got back. There was simply no telling what the kids could get into. The three little'uns played quietly until 8:30, when they had to be put to bed. The dads faced a couple of particularly nasty diapers, ("Must be the potions," Harry had grunted) warmed some formula, and finally got the babies settled in. James, as always, was a bit more of a challenge, but even he succumbed to sleep after a while. Ron and Harry were truly free to relax this time around. They put on the radio and listened to a Quidditch match, and got a few more butterbeers. There wasn't much need to talk, and both were fine with that. When Harry went into the kitchen to get something to eat, though, he noticed something odd. A small door in one of the walls, which Harry had always taken to be another cabinet, was opened and revealed to be a dumbwaiter.

"Hey Ron," he called. "You never told me you had a dumbwaiter."

"Yeah, we keep it closed magically and the only way to get it open is to jab it in the right place," came the response.

"Well then isn't it odd for it to be open right now?" Harry asked. "I'm going to check on the kids, just in case." Harry hurried to the bedrooms. There were Albus and Rose, sleeping peacefully in their cribs. There was James, his sleeping form under his blankets. His head was poking out...what? Since when did James have a teddy bear head? Harry strode over and ripped the covers off. It was nothing but stuffed animals!

Harry was about to yell for Ron, but then he remembered the two sleeping babies. Didn't need them to wake up. He crept out of the room and back to the kitchen dumbwaiter. The thing was small, but even in adulthood Harry was of a more wiry build; cramped, he could just squeeze inside. "Lumos," he said, lighting his wand. It was very dark down the dumbwaiter shaft. Finding the pulley, Harry slowly lowered himself downward. Where did the dumbwaiter lead to? He wasn't aware of any basement in the house, so it was a very curious thing indeed. After what seemed like forever in the tiny space, Harry reached the bottom of the shaft. It opened up into a passageway. There was a torch hanging on the wall, so with a small "_incendio" _Harry lit it. The passageway was long, and only had one way to go. It emptied out into a large, circular chamber...that was furnished rather oddly. An assortment of couches and armchairs cluttered the room, along with several tea tables. Crocheted throws covered nearly every surface, and surprisingly, a fire was crackling in the small fireplace. Nothing could have prepared Harry for what he saw in the center of the room, though. There was James, in the largest armchair, sitting on the lap of..._Lupin? _

Harry stared and stared. This man...he was dead! There was no possible way! "Are-are you a ghost?" Harry managed to whisper.

The strange man chuckled. "Harry, Harry. Of course I'm no ghost. I'm not transparent, am I? Indeed, I_ am_ Lupin. However, I am not _Remus _Lupin. Romulus Lupin at your service."

"But- what? Remus never told me he had a brother! Where have you BEEN? You know your brother is DEAD, DON'T YOU? HE'S DEAD AND YOU DIDN'T STOP IT FROM HAPPENING! WHAT ABOUT TEDDY, YOUR NEPHEW? WHY AREN'T _YOU _RAISING HIM?" Harry fumed. James looked like he was about to cry. He hated when his father went into a rage like this.

"Harry, you must understand me," Romulus began. "I never intended for my brother to die. I did what I could for him! He never knew I existed." Romulus looked very sad.

"What d'you mean, he didn't know you existed?" said Harry, thrown by this bit of information.

Romulus sighed. "My parents had me while Remus was in his first year at Hogwarts. They kept me a secret from him because they were afraid for my safety...I suppose you know he was a werewolf? I didn't like the arrangement much. I couldn't talk to my own brother, he could never know me. During the summers, when Remus was home, I had to stay with our grandparents. It was all right for me to be at home when Remus was at school, and we weren't ever there at the same time since he was so much older." Romulus smiled sadly. "As for my nephew, it is not my right to raise him. Remus never knew of me to give me that responsibility, so lucky you got the job. Anyhow, ever since I became an animagus I've been just as happy to live as a cat. Harry...I'm Crookshanks."

* * *

It took a lot of convincing and some firewhiskey to get Harry calmed down._ Crookshanks? _The whole thing was absolutely mad! Harry could not believe that someone so connected with all the important people of his past had been in hiding for so long. He had to admit, though...the way Romulus explained things, it almost made sense. Almost. Both men knew it would be quite some time before Harry completely came to terms with it.

"Er...Harry?" Romulus/Crookshanks said. "D'you mind...not telling Ron and Hermione? They've given me such a nice home, and I've made myself rather comfortable down here."

Harry thought this was a bad idea. "Romulus, they have every right to know! And think of everyone else, think of Teddy! All the people who would be so glad to know you! Please, change your mind. Even if I tell about you no one will believe me. You'll have to reveal yourself."

Romulus sighed. "Of course, you are right Harry. Is it all right if I do it in a bit, though? It will have to be broken to them very gently, and something tells me this is not a good night for that."

"I guess so," said Harry reluctantly. "But you know, I expect to be seeing you again soon."

"Fair enough," said Romulus with a smile.

Harry and a sleepy James said their goodbyes to the mysterious man, and Harry sent James up the dumbwaiter first. When he was out, Harry himself went back up. There was simply no good way to explain what had happened to him down there! "James, my boy," he muttered, carrying the drowsy toddler to the bedroom, "your life has only just begun, and already your adventures are giving mine a run for their money...Thank God your mother is not here." He laid the child back in the bed, tucked him in, and returned to the living room where Ron had fallen asleep.

Ron woke with a start. "Harry, where've you _been? _You missed a fantastic game! The kids are all right, aren't they?" he asked, suddenly looking anxious.

"Yeah, the kids are fine," said Harry. "But you might consider putting some new charms on that dumbwaiter."

Before Ron could ask what he meant, though, there was a noise outside the front door. Two women were talking, and with a scraping of keys and jiggling of handles Hermione and Ginny entered the house. Hermione's previously smoothed-back hair was loose and wild about her shoulders, and Ginny was rather pink in the face. Both occassionally hiccupped. "He-*hic* hello boys!" said Hermione.

"Hello, dear," said Ron, amused.

"Evening, ladies," said Harry, winking at them. "How was your night out?" he asked.

"Oh, it was just wonderful," Hermione gushed. Suddenly a stern look crossed her face. "Where are the children? Are they all right? Did everything go okay? I would feel just awful if we were out enjoying ourselves and you two had to deal with any emergencies. Oh Lord! There weren't any emergencies, were there?"

"Everything's been fine, Hermione," said Ron patiently. "The kids have been in bed since 8:30 like you told me, and Harry and I have been relaxing. In fact, Harry was just getting back from checking up on the little ones."

Hermione's face brightened again. "Oh, Ron!" she exclaimed. "I always knew you would be a good father." She grabbed him in a kiss for a rather long few seconds, causing Ron's ears to turn red again.

"Er-anytime," he gasped.

Meanwhile, Ginny was telling Harry what they'd been up to. "...and then they said they needed two women to dance, and they picked us, and oh! It was great fun, Harry. But I wish you had been there," she told him coyly.

"So do I, from the sound of things," he told her. "Someone needs to watch after our children, though."

"_Our _children..."said Ginny dreamily. "I love the way you say that, Harry. Do you ever think... maybe we could have another? As you're so good with them?"

"We'll see," said her husband firmly.

"So what did the kids do?" asked Hermione.

"Oh, you know, just played and stuff," said Ron, shooting Harry a look that said "_we had better not tell them what happened or we'll be dead men." _

Harry gave a brief nod. Ron didn't know the half of it. "James was his usual troublemaking self," said Harry. "But we got him sorted out in the end. Really, he made my night much less boring." Suddenly he spotted Crookshanks slinking into the room.

"Oh Crookshanks!" cried Hermione, scooping him up. "Did you help keep the kids in line? Such a good kitty-witty."

"Erm...Hermione," said Harry, "you should probably put him down. I think he's had enough of an interesting night already." The cat turned his head and winked at Harry. Soon enough, everyone would know the secret of Romulus Lupin: but for now, he seemed content being part of a true family at last.

**The End. **

_(A/N: I hope everyone liked my story! A bit of a weird twist near the end there! Reviews are always appreciated. :D)_


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